Losing friends….. Adulting… late 20s

Here comes a time where you really face life with it ups and downs. Where you need to strive and make it at work… where you really want to excel probably in everything you do, your career, building a family and your relationships. I am not quite sure whether it nature or it society that want us to believe that everything should happen at a certain time and age. should it not be done on those specific times there are fore you have failed in this life thing.

I wonder if you still communicate with your “best friend” you had at primary school ? Secondary school maybe? If you are still friends with them I am happy for you, It one of those things that is very rare to happen that we still communicate with old friends that we used to have, for various reason as well, It could be a change of location, It could be that both of you have really evolved and have nothing in common, Life has shifted and introduced new people, new tribes towards your life and that okay.

Drifting apart from friends for me it not a bad thing,in fact I think it normal and I really dont take it personal, I am one person who allows change to come in and adapt towards that change, I may not like the situation and it maybe very uncomfortable but I always try and look at the bright side of things, I quickly check what in for me because in every situation there is something to be learned, In every ending relationship and friendship there is a lesson to be learned. The fortunate part about late 20s is that most of our peers are blossoming , our friends are blossoming and you might just feel like you are not and you are out of the zone, this should not be the reason why you lose your friends, other might be blessed with marriage and kids, others might achieve their big / long term goal early, which will demand more from them, it will demand time and energy. These two reason should not drift apart any relationship you had with your friend but I am not going to shy away from the fact that it can drift you guys apart if it not handle accordingly.

I don’t think it a bad thing if you allow your friend to shine and excel in that position that she finds herself in at that certain moment and you will be on the side to clap for her, the pressure of wanting to excel and achieve everything at a younger age is real and can put you through so much stress and anxiety. No one tells you that it okay to achieve your goals at the age 35, because this is not a competition but it a journey just enjoy the ride, learn the lesson and make mistakes. It difficult because each time when you look at others who have done it and are successful in the game you never check their age , you don’t even think that they might have encountered challenges along the way but they pulled through it.

Society has made it difficult for us to make mistake, it has made it difficult for us to go with the flow and knowing that good things take times to happen, learning a new skill don’t happen in two days, achieving your dreams won’t happen in a blink of an eye. We are so used to quick result because we carry these smartphones and social media makes it difficult to accept reality, So should our goals not be meet at a certain time we decide to end our lives, we decide that we are nothing but a bunch of losers,because depression is real and mental illness is real.

My take away from all this is that, It normal to lose friends that no longer add value in your current life and don’t feel bad about it. Don’t compete it draining and exhausting. Block negative people/ negative friends in your life. Trust in your instincts they always right, don’t wait for confirmation from others because you might never get it. Adulting is not easy, making long life decision it’s not easy as well because you are trying minimize mistake for the future. Mistakes are part of our lives start to embrace them and rejection is our starting point in achieving everything we ever wanted in this life.

#doingitformysoul #embracingchange #lovingmymistakes.